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MOVIE REVIEWS

Posted: Sat Sep 16, 2006 6:40 pm
by migya
MOVIE REVIEWS THREAD FOR EVERYONE!

Add a humourous review of a movie you have seen here gentlemen!




General Rules:
1) No boring, unvulgar reviews!!!! Noone wants to hear a robotic version of why a movie was good or bad! Let your human emotions flow my friends!!!!

2) Pics (not too X rated as our good friend hobbes might not allow it. Though we can skim the boundaries now can't we :mrgreen: ) that convey your thoughts and feelings outrageously if possible!

3) Try starting by reviewing movies that most of us would probably have seen ie. Some old 60s shiit directed by some redneck mungral, viewed by one village in some reclusive spot is no good!

4) Try to respond to other people's reviews, supportively or opposingly but let's all try to not get in any scuffles! Let's direct our anger towards the fascist cunnts of the world :wink:

5) Nothing wrong with a porn movie review :dontknow: They're popular 8)





The ratings I recommend (it is not mandatory for anyone) is a 0 to 5 rating as follows:


0 = Image

1 =
Image

2 = Image

3 = Image

4 = Image

5 = Image


Comprenda

Posted: Sat Sep 16, 2006 8:29 pm
by xbay
Pornography may be popular but the acting just seems real wack...only in certain ones though. But then the screaming, moaning, and physical body parts of the woman in the movie makes up for it.

Posted: Sat Sep 16, 2006 8:37 pm
by migya
xBayAreaWarriorx wrote:Pornography may be popular but the acting just seems real wack...only in certain ones though. But then the screaming, moaning, and physical body parts of the woman in the movie makes up for it.



Not much acting needed - Just a bich or ten copping kok from 5 to 30 guys ( :mrgreen: ) and reacting the way they all do! Screaming, moaning, groaning; what do you like to hear when you're plugging some bich!

Posted: Sat Sep 16, 2006 9:17 pm
by PAWNO
Julie Silver is the best porn actress in the world.

Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 2:24 am
by TMC
Well, I thought that this was going to be a semi-serious topic on movies but you children are too immature to do just that. I wanted a philosophical discussion on life and movies as abstracts representations of life. So f*ck off, you priks, I'll post the kind of reviews I wanted all along.

I'll start with a fast one.




DEBBIE DOES DALLAS

It's an incredibly powerful movie. A Hall of Fame movie without any kind of doubt. A witty allegory of life in it's full splendor. Great acting, too, but the story steals the show. Pay special attention to the unexpected plot twists that will BLOW your mind. Pure poetry.

Image

Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 7:01 am
by migya
You just started this with a bang TMC!

Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 7:03 am
by TMC
migya wrote:You just started this with a bang TMC!


Yeah, now beat that. I don't want to be alone with this. :wink:

Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 7:20 am
by migya
CLICK - Starring Adam Sandler
Year - 2006



Got this movie off a mate some 6 weeks ago. It is one of the best movies I have ever seen! Adam Sandler is at his best in this film about life and love.

What I loved about this movie was how it shows that the superficial lust for power and greed destroys human beings! The way Sandler's character ignored his family to try to rise up in the company he worked for, believing that he was actually doing good for his family is a real true thing for many men in this world! In the end, he loses his family from his side and dies a relative failure. He saves his son (aka Anakin Skywalker) from doing the same and that shows that he learned the true way, something many do just before they die!

Adam Sandler is amazing in this role and he should get great recognition! David Hasselhoff is also real good as he plays the boss of Sandler; a real prik that you just want to kill because he is probably like your boss at work! Hassellhoff is funny and that adds to the movie's appeal. That bich off American Pie (Stifler's mum) plays a useless slut, AGAIN! Christopher Walken is also real good in his character of the tempting angel.

Fukin great movie that most of us can relate to and makes you feel the emotions the main character feels. I loved this movie and it ranks among the best I've ever seen


Image

Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 8:14 am
by TMC
Never heard of it. Gotta check it out, then. Although I don't really dig Sandler's humor. His best roles are when he acts... less Adam Sandler.

But, from you review, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt this time.

Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 9:08 am
by migya
TMC wrote:Never heard of it. Gotta check it out, then. Although I don't really dig Sandler's humor. His best roles are when he acts... less Adam Sandler.

But, from you review, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt this time.




I think it has already come out in the cinemas. See it soon because it really is a good movie

Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 9:20 am
by TMC
migya wrote:
I think it has already come out in the cinemas. See it soon because it really is a good movie


Not here. I've just checked and the european premiere is the 29th.

Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 11:30 am
by TMC
THE ISLAND STARRING SCARLETT JOHANSON
Year 2005

It's the story of some guys (and gals) that are the only survivors of a global contamination that, step by step, got to discover that not everything is what it seems.

With that said, and plot aside, the first hour is pretty good, if you like sci-fi mysteries, but, since then, it becomes a "things that go boom in the night" (or day) flick. They f*ck up the momentum that had been built in the first half on the movie and don't let Scarlett shine enough.

So we end up with an action movie, a dumbed down action movie for that matter. Entertaining but forgettable. A decent flick for a weekend with not much else to do.

Buuuuut, it could have been so much more... IF THE F*CKER THAT DIRECTED THIS PIECE OF CRAP DIDN'T HAD CUT THE NAKED SCENE THAT SCARLETT WANTED TO DO.

May you die in hell, Michael Bay.

Image

Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 7:19 pm
by migya
TMC wrote:THE ISLAND STARRING SCARLETT JOHANSON
Year 2005

It's the story of some guys (and gals) that are the only survivors of a global contamination that, step by step, got to discover that not everything is what it seems.

With that said, and plot aside, the first hour is pretty good, if you like sci-fi mysteries, but, since then, it becomes a "things that go boom in the night" (or day) flick. They f*ck up the momentum that had been built in the first half on the movie and don't let Scarlett shine enough.

So we end up with an action movie, a dumbed down action movie for that matter. Entertaining but forgettable. A decent flick for a weekend with not much else to do.

Buuuuut, it could have been so much more... IF THE F*CKER THAT DIRECTED THIS PIECE OF CRAP DIDN'T HAD CUT THE NAKED SCENE THAT SCARLETT WANTED TO DO.

May you die in hell, Michael Bay.

Image



Sounds like a movie I would see on a Friday or saturday maybe or a weekend day at least

Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 8:53 pm
by xbay
TMC wrote:Never heard of it. Gotta check it out, then. Although I don't really dig Sandler's humor. His best roles are when he acts... less Adam Sandler.

But, from you review, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt this time.



I thought it was one of his best flicks. He adds an emotional feeling to it. Pretty sad ending. But overall, I love the humor of it. If you live here in the U.S., it should be out on dvd in a few weeks or so. It came out in the summer.


Has anyone seen Lucky Number S7even? It seemed pretty cool, anyone seen it or have any review on it?

Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 9:45 pm
by drfrank
TMC, you've never heard of Click?????

i've got two words for you - Kate Beckinsale.

she's baaaaad. bad as in good, of course.