MOVIE REVIEWS

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 3:24 am
WATCHMEN
-------------------------------------
SPOILER FREE


DO NOT TAKE YOUR KIDS TO THIS MOVIE! they were thinking of rating it NC-17 (no one under 17 admitted w/ or w/o parent)

my friend said this movie was stupid and way over hyped before I saw it, so I suppose I wasn't expecting much.

I don't know what he was talking about though, the movie was pretty good on the whole.

coming from a guy that traditionally HATES super hero movies (Batman, Superman, Spiderman), saying it's even OK would translate to extreme praise for most other critics.

I watched it in two, hour and 20 minute sittings (they decided to give me a free private screening on my computer :)) and it still seemed long even with a break in the middle.

It gets props for being a very, very, unique story. For example, it's set in an alternate 1985 America on the brink of WWIII. The main characters are all superheroes that for one reason or another have given up they super hero duties.

Watchmen uses a strange definition of superhero in the movie - there are many, many, heroes that don't seem to have any powers at all, it's as if the only requirement of a superhero is a goofy ass looking costume. it lacks a lot of explanation, like why they decided to become heroes in the first place. You are just supposed to assume that because it's an alternate world superheroes are a part of the culture??? that didn't jive with me.

anywho the characters in this movie are all tragic heroes which makes that movie a lot more interesting than your typical comic book movie. they are all flawed in one way or another, and the movie is really more about them than crime fighting or upholding justice. in fact, the few what I will call "Justice scenes" are way too short, and it makes you walk away from the movies saying "wait so they fight crime or something?" seems like the director got too caught up in the main characters stories to even prove that they are crime fighters.

there is one extremely powerful character called Dr. Manhattan (the blue guy) I have mixed feelings about. they try hard to make him a complex character, and for the most part it works. The only problem is the obvious one - why would someone with superpowers like his, let the world get to WW3? I think whoever wrote the novel gave him way too many powers, and that jeopardizes the believability of the film.

another minor bone I have to pick with the movie, is that it's a little bit too far up it's own ass at times. maybe it's because I didn't read the novel but it just seemed to get way to... like a fantasy that tried to take itself way too seriously. I also felt the same way about the dark knight (batman) - there were no bits of humor in either film to lighten things up, and after 2hours of a serious-fantasy, it's hard not to say to yourself, "do they still expect me to believe this shiit?"

hard to figure out the exact point to everything in the end. I'm going to have to watch it again.

what's cool in this movie
- really get to know the characters
- good acting all around except for the silk spector chick
- cool special effects, and in general, great directing from snyder (he made 300)
- alternate worlds are always cool IMO

what's not so cool
- length
- really out of place sex scenes
- there's a penis flappin around in a few scenes
- a bit too far up it's ass. no humorous moments. It's like listening to a guy that's trying to convince you the lord of the rings is real for 2hrs and 40mins. after a while you have to laugh at him.
- everything about the silver specktor character was weak if you ask me.

I give it a 3.5 out of 5

very similar to the Dark Knight (which I thought was way to long and stupid). this one is slightly less stupid, and was long for a reason (has to tell the story of multiple characters not just 1 like in batman).
Last edited by first off on Tue Mar 10, 2009 4:20 am, edited 1 time in total.
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 4:08 am
I liked the Watchmen overall.
I will agree that the length was really crappy but, the story was good overall.
Before I go on, I will say I haven't read the books so I don't know how much it differs from the movie, I've heard that there are a lot of things they left out. If the books are anything like the movie, I think they tried to make the series sort of like what "Heroes" tries to do, which is the idea of superheroes living in the real world and not being the perfect person with perfect morals and without flaws.
Here are some random thoughts:

**The alternate version of recent history was completely awesome.
**Mr. Manhattan's exposed pee=pee was really disturbing and distracting. He had a cod-piece type thing covering it when he was fighting in Vietnam and at other times of the movie.
**The comedian was the most amazingly complex character in a super hero movie ever that it almost makes him as close to perfect as possible. He was so flawed that you wanted to hate him, and I'm sure most did, but it was in a completely unique way. I can't really describe it, basically, to use something in the story to try and describe what I'm failing to illustrate... he unknowingly hit on his daughter!!!!!
**The ending was completely mind blowing I think. The thing that Ozymandias did to reach world peace was completely unexpected. It also explained why they had the line "Who watches the watchmen?". Obviously, in our real world what Ozymandias did would never work, but since there are SUPER humans in their reality, I could completely buy into it without feeling cheated in anyway.

I have to agree with first off and give it a 4 out of 5.
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 9:25 am
yo first off i love the you tube vid in ur signature. I still can't beleive they cancelled aqua teen :banghead:
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 8:52 pm
jimbob631 wrote:yo first off i love the you tube vid in ur signature. I still can't beleive they cancelled aqua teen :banghead:


yeah, the show was ridiculous!

probably my favorite Adult swim cartoon. for those that don't know Aqua Teen Hunger Force is an unbelievably stupid 15min cartoon that used to be on Cartoon Network.
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 10:36 pm
i give watchmen a 3 out of 5. it was ok for what it was. some parts dragged, was way too long (could have done without some of the flashbacks), story went all over the place which took away from the main storyline. however, when you can see a cute chick naked it's always a good thing. would have been a 3.5 out of 5 had it not been for the swaying cock from dr.manhattan's character...hence the dock in points
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 11, 2009 1:41 am
the watchmen fukken sukked
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 11, 2009 8:59 pm
I heard the blue guy's d*ck flaps around throughout whenever you see a full body shot of him. And then when he duplicates himself or whatever, there's like 5 blue d*cks in the scene.
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 11, 2009 9:08 pm
xbay wrote:I heard the blue guy's d*ck flaps around throughout whenever you see a full body shot of him. And then when he duplicates himself or whatever, there's like 5 blue d*cks in the scene.



Obviously a circulation problem


:mrgreen:
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PostPosted: Thu Mar 12, 2009 2:58 am
people are seriously losing their cool over something that isn't that big of a deal.

it's a 2hr 40min movie. there's less than 10 seconds of penis in the flick. everybody settle down. people make it sound like it's a gay porn flick or something.

Only reason why I mentioned it in my review is because it's a super hero movie, and dumb parents would probably take their kids to see it.

actually it's kinda funny, apparently tons of parents have been leaving the theaters during showings of Watchmen all across the country! It really is an a superhero movie for adults, and that's not including the ten seconds of penis.
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PostPosted: Thu Mar 12, 2009 6:34 am
Transporter 3 - Starring Jason Statham


English superstar Jason Statham is back with another hit in the series of Transporter movies, this the third one. Like the others, this one was great, with the usual great fighting scenes, where Statham shows off his well skilled kicking and martial arts ability. This movie is great and the only thing I didn't like was the ugly, red head, east european skank




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PostPosted: Thu Mar 12, 2009 1:15 pm
first off wrote:people are seriously losing their cool over something that isn't that big of a deal.

it's a 2hr 40min movie. there's less than 10 seconds of penis in the flick. everybody settle down. people make it sound like it's a gay porn flick or something.

Only reason why I mentioned it in my review is because it's a super hero movie, and dumb parents would probably take their kids to see it.

actually it's kinda funny, apparently tons of parents have been leaving the theaters during showings of Watchmen all across the country! It really is an a superhero movie for adults, and that's not including the ten seconds of penis.


it was like 2 seconds per body shot and like 10 body shots. and it wasnt the fact that it was there that bothered me...it was the fact that it was swaying and really wasnt necessary. the movie would have had the exact same affect if the actor were wearing at least a thong.

and overall, for a movie that took 25 years to finally finish and come out, you'd hope for better than you got from that movie.
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 16, 2009 9:53 am
i watched the watchmen at the Metreon on IMAX... so imagine how much bigger Dr.Manhattan looked.

Everyone i knew that watched the movie before i did all said one thing... Weird, but i knew they were all expecting a typical super hero and not understanding ahead of time that watchmen is completely different.

Rorscach was a complete badass... people around me were clapping after each of his major scenes in the film.

My cousin has read the book and the comics and even went on a limb by saying it was the best comic film he has ever seen.

You have to appreciate it for what it was... the movie did drag for a bit but i wasnt at all disappointed.

I went into the film without much knowledge because i would much rather be surprised by whats occuring in the film rather than knowing what will happen. Maybe now ill actually read the story so i can compare now.
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 16, 2009 2:34 pm
Transporter 3 is definitely something I want to see, migya. I really liked one and two.

For Watchmen, my friend found this funny pie graph about what people talk about the most. And the majority is not surprising at all. :mrgreen:

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PostPosted: Sun Mar 22, 2009 12:35 pm
I love you, man

This movie was really funny, funnier than I thought it would be. Paul Rudd's character is so awkwardly funny that you can't help but cringe as you laugh.

Plus, Rashida Jones is incredibly hot.

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PostPosted: Sun Mar 22, 2009 1:01 pm
metalface wrote:Plus, Rashida Jones is incredibly hot.


:D :mrgreen:
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